Bentley's New Year

Bentley came home on 30 Dec 2016 :) 
 
I can't tell you how good that feels. I CAN tell you that it seems like forever since I updated this blog.  It's only been about eight days though. 
 
In that eight days we made it through Christmas and got to see our boy make some huge strides.  Immediately we noticed his personality return.  He also figured out he could walk.  Most of you have seen the video by now.  I can't remember what happened that day, but we had gotten to AAE super late.  Late enough that the staff wasn't sure that we were coming.  The staff must have told Dr. Peters that we had arrived because she was camera ready when we walked back to
see him.  She told us to wait and we did... and he came to us.  It was only a few steps, but it totally reminded me of the feeling I got when my children did the same thing.  A few wobbly steps as they fall into you.  Just to the right side of his enclosure, a stocking hung, gifted by "Santa Paws" who had apparently made it there before we did.  Maybe not your traditional Christmas experience, but one that I will absolutely never forget. 

Once again we brought some small things to our favorite medical team.  Some sweets on Christmas Eve and a Breakfast bake on Christmas Day.  Not much, but something.  All the other animal hospitals are closed on holidays so when you and I are hanging out and enjoying our family time, these guys are sacrificing theirs and standing by.

So, we brought them a picture of Bentley so they could be reminded of how important they are to us, and our pets.  Bentley spent a lot of time there.  We spent a lot of time there.  Even now, it seems strange that I won't be going there tonight.  What was once a inconvenience became something Krysta and I will miss.  We got to know the people there and will miss them dearly.  And because I know some of them will read this, I'll just say:  We are in debt to you and appreciate your care and kindness.  The many things you have done for us and simply for the way you treated us.  Our countless unannounced visits during some pretty stressful times and your ability to keep our spirits up, even when it was your spirits that probably needed to be lifted up.  Most of all, we thank you for taking care of Bentley.  Not once did we ever think he was better off anywhere else.  Not once.  From day one, we knew he was in the best of hands and you proved that time and time again.  You all hold a special place in our hearts and collectively or individually, if any of you ever need anything, please just ask. 


This has been a family affair.  Many of you mentioned that, among other things, we were teaching our kids a lesson about love.  That wasn't intentional, but if that's what they learned, I'll take it.  They are some pretty amazing kids who don't always get the credit they deserve.  They don't have it as hard as many kids their age, but they do put up with a pretty crazy lifestyle.  Mom and Dad are on opposite schedules.  Even now, as I'm writing this, krysta is at the restaurant managing the New Years Eve hysteria.  Kyla is in Atlanta, Katelyn is at a sleepover, and Ryan is with a friend setting off some fireworks.  I'm here covered in panting dogs who think we're under attack.  During the last month the kids have had to adjust their schedules and take on some extra responsibilities so that Krysta and I could get out to do what needed to be done.  Everyone has really pitched in to keep the wheels turning.







And Bentley has kept the faith and waited patiently for us to visit.  Sometimes boycotting his food and water until we were there by his side.  And sometimes he might have gotten some beef jerky or some watermelon as a reward.  If you haven't seen a dog eat watermelon, you'll have to come by.  Ours live for it.  I'm not sure why, because I barely touch the stuff ;)

 The infection is gone now and we are looking to the future.  Seeing Bentley happy has been so encouraging.  A few days ago, they pulled the drain from his amputation site and let us know that he would be coming home soon.  We called the rehabilitation facility down in Aiken and made an appointment for Bentley to start therapy on Monday. Soon, I will actually be taking some time off work so I concentrate on his recovery.  Thought I haven't talked to them in detail, I imagine it will be more intensive in the beginning and taper off or become manageable from home.  If the staff in Aiken is half as good as the staff in Augusta, we will be grateful.

There's still some risk, so we have to be extremely careful with him.  I know you guys have seen other dogs with missing limbs and trust me, I have seen it to.  I know it's not the end of the world.  Once again, it's not that he's missing a leg.  He's missing a leg and his "good leg" is being held together with pins, plates, and screws.  It was the more damaged of the two during the accident.  If a leg shouldn't have made it, it was that one.  And now, that's the one that he is counting on to get him through this.  This thing isn't over and the next few weeks/months will be critical.  However, we have come a long long way, and we are totally up for this next challenge.  He's home.  Did I mention that?

He's kind of "roughing it" these days.  I had to laugh today thinking about it actually.  If there's ever been a more famous Rottweiler, I don't know about it.  This guy is absolutely getting spoiled.  I was on call last night so I slept on the couch just a few feet from him.  He was snoring hard like he'd just returned from some kind of epic adventure.  He made it outside a few times today and proved he can do just about everything on his own.  The activity is wearing him out though so he is getting a lot of naps in. 

Come and get your picture taken with Bentley and you could be in his blog lol.  All the kids in the neighborhood are coming by, taking pictures and making videos.  There is even a movie in production...... apparently.   Though the trailer I saw this morning has more pictures of the kids, and less pictures of Bentley. Either way, Bentley definitely loves the attention and he seems pretty relaxed.  The other dogs are doing a little bit better with him this time too.  The last time he was here, that right leg was really bothering him and the other dogs definitely were able to sense the amount of pain he was in.  This time, there is a more relaxed atmosphere we are hopeful that things will get back to normal before too long. 

Sasha (pictured on left) was the first one to lay down next to him.  She's eight years old and is the "mother" of the house.  She actually lays on the floor in front of his bed facing outward in a protective posture.  She really seems to be protective of him. Bandit on the right is his best friend, who was with him during the accident. Though they haven't reconnected just yet, they don't seem as anxious around each other as they did the last time Bentley was home. 

And speaking of visitors, today Bentley was visited by his "Grandparents".  They own his mom "Bella" and have been supper supportive during this whole ordeal.  These are some truly great people who selectively bred in the qualities we love most in this dog.  Everything you thought you knew about the Rottweiler breed goes right out the window when you meet this blood line.  Absolutely the most peaceful, playful, and well mannered dogs you will ever see. Anyway, it's pretty cool that they cared enough to drive all the way out here to see him.  What a great family Bentley has. 



So that's where we're at right now.  Starting therapy on Monday and waiting to see what comes next.  But before I go, I have to include two last pictures.  This one is from the hospital last night, right before Bentley was released.  Ryan was checking him out to make sure that he was in good enough shape to come home.  He couldn't hear a heart beat, but we brought him home anyway, just in case. 

And this, my friends, is Booger.  No blog is ever complete without a picture of Booger. Ryan actually got to feed her a bottle which put her to sleep in his arms.  He doesn't get too excited about animals but That's a mighty cute Booger.  You're welcome :)


So that's Bentley's New year.  He wanted me to thank you again for all the support.  He also wanted me to wish you and your families a great 2017.  We wish you all exceptional health and happiness.

The Best Stories

The best stories are the ones that we tell over and over again.  Those stories are often the ones that offer a lesson.  With respect to dog stories, there are some really good ones.  They usually involve a dog that never gave up or a dog that waited.  A dog that saved a human or a dog that stayed by their side through something tragic.  They are stories of loyalty.  We don't often see the roles reversed because... let's be honest, dogs are often seen as expendable.  They are considered replaceable.  Not all of us see them that way though.

Bentley's right rear leg was amputated on Tuesday the 20th of December 2016 in the late afternoon, exactly one month after his accident.  It was a two and a half hour surgery.  He had a skilled surgeon and the most amazing technicians by his side.  It was flawless.  He was sleeping when I arrived and heavily sedated.  But like always, when he heard my voice, he fought through all of it to lift his head and acknowledge me.  He fought to sit up and when I reassured him he laid back down with a heavy head an snored, resting deeply.  Every two or three minutes he would open his eyes just slightly to make sure I was still there.  I stayed for about 45 minutes.  He was covered with a blanket and I could not see the results of his amputation.  I'm not sure I wanted to because honestly, I was struggling with it more than he ever would.  To me it was a realization that we would never do certain things again.  Our relationship was physical.  It was wrestling, fetching, and chasing.  In a way, it was me feeling sorry for me. When I left him, he was sleeping.  The T-shirt I had worn all day was in
in my pocket.  I rolled it up and left it near his nose so he could smell me while I snuck out.  

yesterday, Krysta and I made it down there in the early evening.  He was totally uncovered when we came in.  I'm not sure what I was expecting.  I still haven't adjusted to it.  Krysta and I covered him back up, but only because we wanted to remove his windshield and didn't want him messing with his wound.  He cried happily the whole time we were there.  He was clearly feeling better and though I'm sure he was still in some pain, he was visibly more comfortable.  Krysta shared a video on FB that some of you saw.

I'm always struggling to keep things in perspective.  To me, it's about his survival.  I can tell you that I feel good about what we have done.  I can tell you that I sleep good knowing that he's still here.  I can tell you that he is practically oblivious to the fact that his right leg is missing.  The whole time we were with him, he didn't give it a second glance.  He concentrated on us begged for attention.  That's all he wanted. 









Dr. Runnels confirmed that we made the right decision.  During the amputation he was able to inspect the right femur and confirmed how much it had been corrupted.  The FHO would likely have failed or, at best, would have been a ticking time bomb.  The amputation will allow us to move on and get started on rehabilitation.  First however, his wound has to heal.  It has to heal without infection.  Another infection could be a disaster.

We're back to waiting.  I'm not sure when Bentley can come home.  The Dr. seemed very optimistic, but I don't want him here if he's safer there.  I like him being with experts. 



So this is the new Bentley.  When I visited today, he was the happiest I have seen him since before the accident.  He was sliding all over the place, shaking his nub, and trying to sit up.  He did sit up a little bit.  He hasn't gotten it all figured out just yet.  To my amazement, he doesn't seem to care that his leg is gone.  It's almost like it was never there.  It's more of a "confusion" as to why certain things are difficult.  He's smiling and genuinely seemed to feel good.  When I left, he drug himself out of his pen and followed me like that's what he was supposed to do.  When I finally got him secured and transitioned back to the waiting room, he let out the most extraordinary howl.  I've never heard him howl like that.  I didn't even know he could do that.  I guess that's clear evidence that he was raised with huskies. (Don't tell him he's not a husky).   

This was the last photo I took today.  Yes, that's a grin on his face.  Like I said, he has no clue that he's not the same dog he was a month ago.  He's determined and he's supported. 

Thanks for staying with us and thanks for the tremendous support you have provided to this family.  We are reading every comment and feeling every bit of love.

Please continue to share his story.  That's especially true for those of you who are local.  There are two more things that I still need to accomplish.  The first, is rehabilitating this dog and improving his quality of life.  The second is about closure.  Krysta and I need to speak with the girl who hit him.  We may never get that chance, but maybe she is reading this, or maybe she will.  Once again, we need her to know that he's alive and that it wasn't her fault.  Please help me get that message to her.

Love ya'll. 

Let the experts be experts

Last Friday evening I took the kids to see Bentley.  When we finally got back to see him we were told that the "protocols had changed".  A culture had come back which identified Bentley's infection as MRSA.  We had to put on surgical gloves to interact with him.  We also noticed that his personality had changed.  He was a bit more uncomfortable.  We had a nice visit, but we knew that this wasn't going in the direction we wanted it to.  On Saturday I had 12 hour duty and Krysta was playing catch up with a million things, and she worked all night.  It was the first day since 21 November that we didn't get to visit him.  It's hard to believe that it has been a month since he was hit.  Every single decision we have made, we have questioned, and the cascade of decisions since the first have all come with their own cost.

I've made a two observations in the last month that I would like to share with you.  The first?  People make hard decisions every day.  We have spent so much time around the staff at Augusta Animal Emergency (AAE), that we have gotten to see some things that you may never get to see.  I can't tell you about those things because it's not my place to. It's personal and it's private.  It's our unspoken agreement that when we get to lay with Bentley, that everything happening around us in none of our business.  It's their story.  I wish I could document everything I've seen.  They don't get credit for the horrible phone calls they have to make, the long hours of surgery, the years and years they have dedicated to becoming experts, or the countless successes that return pets to people like me.  It's truly amazing.  Their dedication to their profession is inspirational. 

The 2nd?  A lot of people think we are crazy :)  I can see it in their eyes when I tell them what we are doing.  I'm ok with that.  I don't have many friends outside of Facebook LOL.  Professionally, I am very outgoing and go out of my way to engage people and make them smile.  Privately, I don't spend a lot of time with anyone outside of my wife and children.  I don't go out, I don't drink, I don't have those relationships that many of you have.  I have a best friend and we became friends in a time when time was all we had.  I couldn't create that relationship with him today because I don't have time to create it.  I don't have desire to create it.  It's preexisting and permanent.  My other friend is a dog named Bentley. He makes all sorts of noises when he sees me.  He snorts and shakes and his whole body wiggles.  I have a different relationship with him than I have with my Huskies whom I also love dearly.  He is constantly trying to crawl into my lap and when I am dealing with a bout of anxiety or depression he makes me feel better just by being next to me.  He's a pretty easy friend to have. So even though I understand where people are coming from, I hope they try to understand where I'm coming from. 

Krysta and I stopped to see Bentley last night on our way to her work holiday party.  We tried to get a few pictures of him wearing some cute Christmas stuff, but he wasn't trying to participate in that.  Unfortunately, he seemed a little bit more uncomfortable and just couldn't seem to find a position that would suit him.  We left him wondering what the good doctor might say when he saw him the following morning.  You're always hoping for great news, but great news is a little hard to come by these days. Bentley did manage to drink some water and he seemed comforted by our presence.  I wish he could just tell us what do or what not to do.  I would like to think that he just trusts that what we decide is in his best interest. 

Bentley isn't suffering, but he's in a lot of pain.  The right leg is damaged and the infection hasn't done it any favors.  Krysta was able to visit this morning and got some pretty tough news.  Due to so many different factors, against his own desire to salvage the leg, the doctor recommended amputation.  At this point, the condition of the leg, and the amount of pain in the hip is putting him in jeopardy.  It's preventing him from rehabilitating his left leg and it's wearing him down physically and mentally.  If we lose his will to participate, we lose everything.  I called Dr. Davis from the rehabilitation center in Aiken and had her call Dr. Runnels to discuss the risks/rewards.  The general consensus from the experts is to move forward with amputation.  Sometimes you just have to let the experts be experts.

So this is how I left my buddy tonight.  His face burned into my mind on the long drive home.  Tomorrow his right leg will be removed.  He will go through a recovery period.  While that may be painful, it will prevent so much more long term pain.  As soon as possible we will get him to Aiken to start rehab.  They have a chair that he will use to help him.  They said we can borrow it to use around the house.  It should support him enough to allow the left leg to gain muscle mass.  More importantly, we will get him home and that in itself will make him happy. 





This story is far from over.  I just want to thank you all again for your love and  support.  We also want to thank the staff at AAE and Dr. Davis from Aiken.  Please pray for Bentley tomorrow.  If you are not the praying type, think about him tomorrow and put some positive energy out there.  It will be an extremely difficult day for my family and I.  Much love to all.




 

What's next?

I'd be lying if I told you I knew what comes next.  The last three weeks have taught us a few things.  First, we learned that our chaotic life wasn't that chaotic at all.  At least not as chaotic as it could be. Krysta made a comment today that stuck with me.  "I feel like I'm getting behind in life".  I feel that way too.  We are getting behind in life.  There's no better way to put it.  Second, I learned not to underestimate the kindness of strangers.  When someone spends their free time making a Christmas blanket for a dog because someone else loves that dog, that person is special to you.  Bentley looks mighty handsome in his new blanket. Thanks Becky :)  Third?  Third, I learned that you can't go back.  You can't change anything.  You can't latch the gate.  You can't make sure it's latched before you let the dogs out.  You can't pay more attention.  And because you can't go back and do those things.. or do them again, you let those things go.  Now you deal with it.  You process it.  You pay for it.  You move on.  You get the kids started on homework, you get them to soccer, you get them in showers, you get them in bed and you find a way to get back down to the hospital so you're dog will eat his food and take his medicine.  Sometimes... always, that's at 1100pm.  You don't complain. 

You do the same thing on your lunch break if you can.  You drive 30 minutes, feed your dog lunch, reassure him, and shove his pills down his throat.  You take lots of selfies.  Then you drive 30 minutes back to work.  You do that because you have awesome people in your life that allow you to.  You do that because even though there are professionals watching over him, it doesn't alleviate you from your responsibilities.  It weighs heavy on your conscience.  You listen to the doctors and start thinking about what comes next.  You wonder what happens after the infection.  You wonder when he's coming home.  If he'll walk again.  You wonder if the girl who hit him is reading your blog.  You wonder if she knows it wasn't her fault.  You wonder if she needs a hug.  You wonder if she knows that you are thankful that she's safe, that she didn't risk her life to save his.  That she didn't kill someone else or herself because your dog ran out in front of her.  You wonder if she knows that he's alive and that she didn't kill him.

So what comes next?  Well, the Doctors want to try to salvage his right leg.  It's a mess right now.  The infection and trauma left it's mark.  They could see all the way down to the bone plate.  To save his leg, the Doctors may attempt a FHO (Femoral Head Ostectomy)  Essentially, they will cut the ball off the top of his femur...  the part that goes into his hip joint.  They will allow the body to heal in a way that creates a new "false" hip joint.  It's actually pretty common, but that doesn't make it full proof.  That comes with it's own risks, but it may be the best chance to save his leg, and we like best chances.  We've been "best chancing" it for three weeks.  That could happen as early as next week and with a  lengthy recovery, it might be several weeks before he is ok to come home.  That's just a guess, because I don't actually know anything. 

Bentley is on a bit of a hunger strike right now.  We get him to eat by hand feeding him.  He seems a little bit depressed and I can't blame him.  I have no idea what's going on in his head but I know that it has to be hard and a little lonely.  I just got home from work and the kids want to see him.  We will visit a little earlier this evening and bring him some chicken and rice.  Krysta said she had some luck with that earlier.  He still tries to jump up when we come in.  Lots of heavy panting.  It takes him a while to settle down.  It seems like we just get him relaxed before we leave again.  The staff there continues to amaze me.  We are there so much that I sometimes forget it's an emergency room and not a "hangout".  We try to do little things for them, bring food etc.. but it pales in comparison to what they do for us. 

It's hard every time we leave.  This is the first night he got his blanket.  I wrapped him up and I think it was late enough that he was pretty tuckered out.  This doesn't represent the norm.  usually he watches me like a hawk.  His eyes fixate on me and it's almost a psychotic stare.  Once again, who the heck knows what he's thinking.  I'm guessing he is a little confused and thinks we should be taking him with us.  That's what I would think if I were him. 

And that's where we're at.  Just like you, we're waiting to find out what's next.  Tonight when Krysta gets off work, we'll fold laundry, clean the house, get the kids settled, and try to catch up with life so we can get up and do it all again tomorrow.  And it's ok.  We won't complain. 

We're not ready

48 hours ago, emotionally exhausted, and

overwhelmed, Krysta and I were ready to say goodbye.  Dr. Runnels walked us through the options again and we had absolutely no hope.  A bad infection in a bad leg, in a wounded dog.  He asked us "Where are you at".  He wanted to know what we were thinking. We told him we were ready to let Bentley go. I'm not sure what he was thinking, or what he saw, but he saw something we couldn't see and offered us an opportunity.  He gave us some hope and ultimately gave us a chance for a different outcome.  

This is Bentley tonight. He's beating this infection and he's not giving up. Over the last few days we have had life long friends, family, and countless strangers message us with support. The amount of love is unimaginable. My friend Crystal messaged me tonight to tell me that her daughter prayed for him today in school.  I can't wrap my mind around it.  I can't fathom how so many of you are following this story.  Over 2000 people have visited this blog, just today.  I don't even know 2000 people. Krysta and I combined don't know 2000 people.  Dr. Peters was there tonight when we visited with Bentley.  She has been so compassionate and so authentic through this whole thing. Every staff member from AAE has earned their wings in my mind.  Dr. Peters was a little misty eyed tonight and said "we aren't ready to give up on him yet".  With Doctors like this, and people like you, we are in great shape.  

So many of you have said that when he is ready to go, he will let us know. He's not.  This dog absolutely threw a fit when we came in tonight.  I don't remember another time when he was as vocal.  He's not done yet and I don't know how, but we will find a way.  Your love and encouragement has made all the difference.  Every prayer has been heard and somehow he knows.  The antibiotics are working and he started on some stronger medicine this evening to ensure that the job is finished.  I just can't even tell you how grateful I am right now.    

Kyla brought this pillow in last night and swore that it was his "favorite pillow".  I wasn't too sure about that, but sure as heck looks like it. He is resting comfortably right now and he's got the most wonderful staff watching over him.  

This is a picture of Krysta with a goat.  What does this have to do with anything?  Nothing. It has nothing to do with anything.  His name is "booger" and Bentley got a little jealous that mom was holding him.  I figured I would share this with you because seeing Krysta with a goat just feels good.  :)

We have a long way to go.  Not only do we have a long way to go, but we have no idea where we are going or how we are getting there.  We only know that there's more to this story.  We're thankful that there's more to this story. 

Options

Too many ups and downs in the last three weeks. It's easy to second guess every decision we have made.  I often think there should be someone who gets paid to tell you when you've had enough. Like the referee in a boxing match.  Someone who sees you taking a beating and finally stops the fight because they know you've taken too many shots and you shouldn't get up any more.  


Krysta and I visited Bentley late last night.  I stayed in Augusta all day yesterday waiting on news.  Too many traumas yesterday and I had to feel bad for the hospital staff.  There is nothing open here on Sundays, so everything comes to them and they triage and move.  The emotional highs and lows. Saving some and watching others slip away. Each one different and each one special in its own way.  Care givers, for humans and animals, never get the credit they are due.  

I had gotten home sometime around four or five and I honestly don't remember when the Dr. called.  I had just gotten out of the shower and had a missed call.  I called back and they were calling Krysta simultaneously. We were both on the phone with separate people at the same time.  Supposedly they had drawn straws as to who was going to call us.  I think they have grown quite attached to Bentley. Krysta did most of the talking.  I tuned out about half way through the conversation when it started sounding like a condolence call.  That's not really what it was, but it wasn't much better than that.  Lots of tears followed that conversation.  Krysta and I went down at ten thirty or so to make sure Bentley got his medication which was due at eleven.  He was alert as always, so happy to see us.  He ate some food.  He only eats when we hand feed him now.  I'm not sure if he pulls that with the staff or if he just wants to be spoiled by us.  

This morning I called Dr. Davis and cancelled Bentley's rehabilitation.  He was supposed to start this morning and obviously that's the least of our worries now. Dr. Runnels from AAE called us shortly thereafter and talked us through our remaining options.  The infection is deep in his right leg and has dissolved much of the good tissue.  The concern is that it will compromise the implant, get into his blood stream and/or compromise the density of the bone, or worse, killing him. Getting the infection under control is the most important thing and they are using everything they have to that end.  So, none of the following options even matter until the infection is gone.  

1.  If we want to salvage the leg, he will likely need to see a specialist.  That would mean transport to a new location, extensive surgery, and lengthy inpatient care. We don't see that as an option as we just don't have the resources for it.  We can't guarantee that it would be successful anyway.  

2.  Amputate the right leg.  This would typically be a great option and we knew originally that it could happen.  However, the concern is that his left leg isn't strong enough to support him and that a month from now it could fall apart leaving him with no back legs.  Remember, the left leg was the more damaged of the two and it will be months before it is truly healed.  It's a huge risk and also comes with a fairly high price tag.  I think we could do it, but the rehab and after care could break us should there be any complications.

3.  Quit.  Let him go and say enough is enough.  When you think of cost, quality of life and countless other factors, it's the one reasonable solution.  

That's the conclusion Krysta and I came to this morning.  It was tormenting.  We went to Augusta this morning to say goodbye.  The Dr. was waiting for a decision. When we got there Bentley was completely sedated.  He lifted his head and tried his hardest to stay with us.  He drifted to sleep as we sat with him discussing the options with the Dr. once again.  After going back through the options and asking as many questions as we knew to ask, we communicated our wish to let Bentley go.  The Dr. was very compassionate.  However, he suggested that we give it another day or two and see what the infection does before we made that decision. I think he is hoping that the infection hasn't done as much damage as he thinks it's done and maybe there is a chance the leg can be salvaged without extensive surgery.  Of course, Krysta and I were looking for any way out.....  so we took it. 

Tonight I took the kids to say goodbye. They know that there is a chance that he can survive this but we are also not sugar coating it.  If Krysta and I have to make a difficult decision, it might happen while they are in school and I wanted to make sure they had an opportunity to say goodbye.  As we left tonight, the girls were sobbing and some key staff as well.  It didn't tell the staff the kids were there to say goodbye, but i'm guessing they have seen it before and know what it looks like.   

Bentley enjoyed a full compliment of treats and was hand fed by the girls. His spirits are really good.  Just seeing his personality change when his best kids are around melts my heart.  I can't imagine what he must be thinking.  

Kyla brought Bentley his "favorite pillow".  He used to sleep with her most nights in her bed.  I'm not entirely sure if it's really his favorite, but as we left tonight his head was laying on it.  If nothing else, the scent is familiar and that's got to count for something.  He was always a good sleeper.  

This was my favorite picture of the night.  Kyla holding Bentley and katelyn holding his paw.  This is authentic. Life is precious.  














I'm not sure where any of this is going.  We are holding it together but it's slipping away from us.  I think back to the night he was hit and can't imagine not trying to save him.  If nothing else, the last three weeks with him has been a gift and that's how I'll always see it.  A gift.  A gift from so many loving people.  We are blessed.  it's not always easy to see it that way, but we are blessed.  

Bentley's in trouble

When I started this blog my intent was to tell you a good news story.  I envisioned a story of triumph.  I thought I would be posting pictures of my buddy overcoming enormous odds on his journey to normalcy. I wanted to show you that he could be the same dog he was before and that we would do all the same things we did.  Now I just want him to survive.  I really don't care if he's the same.  I don't envision him chasing the ball through the yard or me up the stairs.  I don't see him chasing the kids through the house in some version of hide and seek.  Bentley is in bad shape right now.  This is a picture of him last night.  He crawled from his bed over to the coffee table and slept with his head propped against the leg.  The incision on his right leg was leaking fluid and we knew it was infected.  We were treating him with Amoxicilin and cleaning his wound a few times each day with Chlorhexidine.  This morning we noticed that it hadn't gotten better and decided to take him back to the hospital for evaluation.  The news was worse than we had ever imagined but I'll get to that in a minute.  

The weekend started out pretty good.  This is a picture of Bentley watching the Army Navy game with me.  I'll always remember this because (of course) the Army hadn't won that game in 14 years.  I'm embarrassed to admit this, but this was the first time I had ever watched the game from start to finish.  I don't watch much football on Saturday's but Bentley insisted that I lay next to him with the iPad.  He mostly slept...  that's a pattern with him apparently.  He slept through the skins game last Sunday too.  Anyway, as you know, the Army was victorious and no matter what happens, I can always say that Bentley and I witnessed the Army win.  Not everyone gets to say that.  

This was day that Krysta and I were supposed to bring Bentley home the first time.  Of course he ended up having to stay a while longer.  When I look at this photo I can't believe we could smile.  Our lives are hectic.  We work opposite schedules and don't have a whole lot of time together. She's a lot tougher than I am.  We pass each other on the go and try to keep up with the kids, two of them in soccer, and take care of everything that needs to be done around the house.  I swear we never stop.  I'm always thankful though.  She never questioned my (our) decision to save Bentley and I know without a doubt that no matter what comes next, she will be right there with me.  I'm lucky beyond words.  

Tonight I got the call from Dr. Peters (we love her by the way) and she didn't mince her words.  Bentley has a awful infection and he's in trouble.  There is a lot of dead tissue in his right leg and the infection has been resistant to the antibiotics.  The have sent the fluid off to biopsy and are waiting to see what kind of bug it is.  In the mean time they are going to remove as much tissue as possible, treat with the strongest antibiotics they have available and see if they can save him.  The best case scenario is that the antibiotics have an immediate impact and he can move forward.  That's not the most likely scenario at this time.  We are prepared that Bentley may lose his right leg.  That absolutely destroys me, but if that's the only thing that will keep the infection from spreading through his body, we're ok with that.  There's a lot we don't know.  We don't know how far the infection has spread and we don't know how Bentley's left leg would recover without the support of the right.  There is a lot of uncertainty right now.  It looks like he will have a few days in the hospital and I simply can't imagine what else any of this might mean.  We are getting ready to go to the hospital now to see him and give him his other medication.  I hope to get some more details. Simply not the news I want to share with you.

But here we are waiting again and hoping that he can beat this.  Dogs have such a great instinct.  They always know things before they are supposed to know things.  I caught these two laying and watching the front door.  They never lay there. Always in the living room.  Never together like this.  But Bentley didn't come home today and the whole house in on edge and they just know what they know.  

Thanks so much again for following us.  This has been very hard on our family.  For anyone who wants to help, please share Bentley's Gofundme  with those who might be interested.  Every little bit helps and buys him a few more options.  We wouldn't have made it this far without help.  We are SO appreciative.  

Much love to all of you and please keep Bentley in your prayers tonight. He will need all the help he can get to beat this thing.  

He's walking :)

He's walking :)  Not much, but he's doing it. We had taken him out a few times to use the bathroom and noticed that he wasn't going to conduct the day's business with spectators.  Most of us don't like others watching us poop, and this guy happens to dislike it as well.  So we left him.  When we came back outside we would find him somewhere much further out in the yard. We assumed he was crawling. This morning during the chaos of getting the kids off to school we finally saw him walk.  It was a bit like watching Bambi on ice.  His back legs are very weak and unstable, but he managed to stay up for about three minutes and was able to make a deposit.  I don't know about you, but in my book, that's victory. Unfortunately, he looks to have a minor infection in his right leg.  We noticed his staples were seeping a little this morning.
Krysta had to take him in today to have
 it cleaned and get some more  
medicine for him.  

It wasn't always that easy.  Earlier in the week we tried to mimic our experience at the animal hospital. We saw the Dr. there run some warm water over Mr. Winky in an effort to get his fluids going.  Here you can see that we put him in the bathtub.  Krysta started running some water on his daddy parts and sure enough.....  he fell asleep. Knocked out.  Gone. Snoring. Unconscious.  This dude can snore too.  Sounds like a full grown man with sleep apnea.

Our home has become a rehab facility.  We covered our wood floors with random carpets that we acquired from various sources.  It keeps him from slipping on the slick surfaces as we hoist him around.  Sasha claimed this particular rug and didn't mind sharing it with Bentley.  Willow and Sasha don't seem to mind him as much as before. Unfortunately, Bandit still won't come near him and growls at him if they get too close. He's hiding up in my room as I write this. Wish I could figure out what's going on with those two.  

Krysta and Bentely have really bonded through this thing.  I think she had always seen him as my dog and was often frustrated with his high energy and antics.  Or maybe it was the fact that he ate everything in his house and deposited it (by natural means) in the back yard.  Mostly Ryan's legos.  He's really clung to her since he's been home.  This may be my favorite picture yet.  









We spend most of our time on the floor now. Floor beds and pillows have become the standard.  I love the fact that so many people are following this recovery.  Every time I go on Facebook I am reminded that there are so many others experiencing their own hard times and tragedies.  I am reminded that our journey is but one of many. All things considered, our trouble is minor.  Perspective is everything.